the next phase of life,
About me

Name:Mariam aka MJL
About you: Life is a journey and full of experiences awaiting for the soul to submerge and eventually triumph over obstacles.



|Xia Yan

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Sunday, July 20, 2008

( My life thus far!!! )

Been working for the past three weeks and next week according to my colleague, is our first month pay. Being a junior worker, I am very excited that I am going to get paid for my job.
Last Friday, I got 3 new cases all with discharge and care problems. And what I learnt from that is to manage my time properly and I am not going to back out because of that. My supervisor jokingly said, “So fast burning out already?” As usual, I laughed at that but deep inside I ask myself if this is what I want. My heart says go easy on it and let yourself makes mistake. That was the first time that I got 3 cases in one day and as a beginner I was surprised that I manage to interview all three but I did not do my home visit as schedule and that makes me upset. I guess I put a lot of hopes and expectations to perform on my first week of handling cases. Next week, I just going to take things very slowly and try not to be overzealous with work.

Till then, people that read my blog, I appreciate u all. We may not see one another on a regular basis but if got time, do message this old friend of yours…because I cannot message during work but I will get back to you after that….

4:55 PM

Sunday, July 13, 2008

( updates... )

I have started work for two weeks now and will be handling my own case after this week
Regarding about the commencement, a friend of mine said, it was much disorganized and ‘I feel not special by their treatment’. I feel the same way as she does and the ceremony was not what we had in our mind. It is all one for each own and I was so upset with the whole arrangement I decided to leave early for my dinner with family.
Commencement should be a time where students feel that they are special e.g a gift from the school would be nice and as a student from that institution, I was not very happy with their service. I believed that as a student who pays for her school expenses has the right to feel ‘special’ on that day. Anyway, enough of that.

I met up with an old friend of mine. He is still very oddly cute to me all these while and as usual, we chatted and our conversation went like this;

Chuan: yam, I found love have you found it before?

Me: I think I found it before

Chuan; what did you do with it?

Me; I let it go.

Chuan: huh!! How come? Aren’t we supposed to keep it?

Me: why keep it when love is to share

Chuan: you mean you let go of the person that you ever love to go away from you. I think that is not fair for you and him. What happened?

Me: I did not say that. I meant I found love and gave my love to him. If you keep it, he will never know it. Why would you keep your love?

Chuan: Oh, so you mean, find it and let it go to that person

Me: yes guochuan dear!

Also an update on more of me!!! I received an email that insinuates I am being inconsiderate and mean! The content of the email is very biased and is directed at humiliating me as a person, a woman and most of all a friend. I can’t fathom why some people cannot speak up for themselves and need others to help them on this matter. It is very unfair because the person that wrote the email do not seem to have the slightest idea on the issue that was being discussed. Furthermore, the email seems to imply that I am not matured enough to handle the matters of human relationship and as ‘a graduate’ I should know it better. All I can say is that this is utterly rubbish because my education has got nothing to do with this matter and being a graduate does not mean I am more ‘expert’ than anyone else in human relationship. We are humans and we all makes mistakes and why some people like to put my education as a measure of my actions. This is not justifiable for anyone especially where clarification matters to me. The person that wrote the email heard only one side of the story and believed that person words hence formulate a conclusion on who I am without even hearing from my side.

Sometimes love makes the mind being clouded so much by the intense emotion that our actions show that ridicule in us as a person. I did not blame anyone on what has happen because many things happened for a reason.

Chuan advice is to forget about those mean people and get on with life. I am a fighter and I will not just keep quiet especially where accusation and assumption matters. I hate to be assumed and misunderstood. I have been keeping my cool far too long that let people capitalize it to hurt me. People like this will come along my life again and if I keep ignore it, I will feel unsettled. So my question is, will you keep ignoring things even though that is an accusation? Think about it

12:02 AM