the next phase of life,
About me

Name:Mariam aka MJL
About you: Life is a journey and full of experiences awaiting for the soul to submerge and eventually triumph over obstacles.



|Xia Yan

May 2005
June 2005
July 2005
August 2005
September 2005
December 2005
January 2006
March 2006
May 2006
September 2006
January 2007
March 2007
April 2007
May 2007
August 2007
September 2007
October 2007
November 2007
December 2007
February 2008
March 2008
May 2008
June 2008
July 2008
August 2008


Sunday, August 21, 2005

( )

Things would never be the same again and everything of yesterday was lost in space. Nobody bothers to save it-mjl

You are always in my heart in every breathe that I take
To forget is not a an option
To make it happen is my decision
You are my gem
You are my new pearl
That I wear forever in my heart

Can I ever resist smiling at you?
Can I ever force myself to hate you?
Can I ever forget you?

You give me pleasure with
Sweetness of the night surrounds us
Topped with chandelier,
Wind that breezing
In making of love between us

You give me pain that nobody else
Would understand
You give me tears that I still remember

To have you was my greatest achievement

Now I do not mind leaving the memories behind
As I know you once was mine- MJL

2:34 AM

Saturday, August 20, 2005

( SAD? what you think? )

i always tell myself my life will not start till i reach university. this is the place where i will find lots of things to do. somehow i look at this place as a modem that could reshape and reinvent the old me .

after two weeeks of attending lectures and going to the places in that uni, this so called modem have done no effect on me. i feel stuck and frustrated by the way things are going.
my best pal mention 'go there with an open heart' - indeed i did so but i do not seem to get the response or should i say the positive feedback from that place. lectures are fun but friends new ones are still in re making or should i say still stuck at the network

is this what we call sad?
sad when nothing to look forward to
sad when life rejects the lone
sad it is when you are nothing-mjl

3:04 AM

Friday, August 05, 2005

( )


A life journey is not going to end just by a little setback. This is an opportunity for you to gain experience and amend your little mistake. I have always respected your decisions and whatever you think is right. I feel bad about the situation but there is little I can do to salvage the rotten problem. I am simply shock and is very reluctant to accept the fact you are leaving when I am only about to feel a sense of belonging. My premature happiness is dead

Your smile brighten up my day
Your little jokes make me feel comfort
Your response gives me a life to carry on
My day here will not complete without your presence
And the work I am doing is suddenly meaningless

by: mjl

12:55 AM

Wednesday, August 03, 2005

( )

What is left now is just memory of yesterday. Nothing can replace the time wasting waiting for the One. The only answer that can be derived is only the word STUPID.

It is really stupid to hang on to the memories of yesterday and thought that everything will be achieved if one tries hard enough to hold on to those memories. Holding on to those memories never make you feel as if you reach nirvana. It only makes the matter worse. It makes you a person who does not live in this realistic world and makes you lost in touch with your everyday lives. Your life would then be surrounded by your own imagination and those memories that you think makes you are actually breaking you psychologically.

The only advice that a good friend can give is to forget the yesterday thing and get on with life. What happened yesterday are an experience and a lesson for you to become stronger. It is also for you to upgrade your psychological thinking and be firmer with decision makings in life.

We are just plain humans and we need memories sometimes to get ourselves going but to hold on to those memories to a very high degree would only hinders your own character from developing

Blaming others for our own mistake is a consolation for the poor heart. Not being able to point the blame at someone else makes us feel guilty. – Mjl

1:14 PM

( No man is an island )

In this world nobody can survive living alone and for the moment nobody in this world has succeeded yet living alone with no friends. Like the saying goes no man is an island no one in this world can survive without any social life. Humans need company, need to be love and to love. There is always this desire to share little secrets with someone and to be happy and want to make someone happy.

It is ridiculous when someone comes up to you and says “I am fine by myself alone.” You should reply, “oh dear, you need professional help”. Never say that you can live without any support from anyone. You are simply deluding yourself and make others derided you.

A person who thinks he can achieve big things with no support from others is a big loser. Even if he does achieve big things nobody can share his joy. He share joy with no one and that is pathetic.

Everybody is weak in some ways and we need friends, companies and love from someone somewhere who could just give a tap on the shoulder and says “ hey I care for you.” That makes a lot different as it makes you feel a sense of belonging.

you will never be alone
there is always a person behind
you must not feel inferior
there is always a solution
you must continue your life
as there is someone waiting for you

look up to the sky
that is the very same sky that everyone else share
look down to the ground
that is the very same soil everyone is stepping on

what is holding you back?

release yourself from apprehension
accept yourself in order to accept others

you can never crawl without a mother's help
you may never talk without someone talking to you
you would never be born without the love
you would never be here without a purpose

you are not alone and you know it

from: mjl

2:19 AM