feeling really hollow

I have not been blogging for months and to write something now gives me the jitters.
I know I have been missing a lot in action organised by my friends and families, to them I say sorry. I have been contemplating about my future my friends, about what I want in life and what I hope to achieve, the truth is I find nothing. I feel hollow when I think about my future. The route that I want to take is never in place, it is just part of my imagination.

I don’t know what I am doing in the university and why am I there when my heart is not there? I try to convince myself that there is always an alternative or a plan B when the original one fails to happen. Seem like my conviction fails.

I am lost in transition